Charlie at the Beeb

Hey, I was on BBC Hereford & Worcester today, talking about Made of Stone and various other stuff with Mike Wyer, who was standing in for Tammy Gooding. Many thanks to Mike for asking the questions, and to listeners for listening to the answers (plus all the ums and ers).

If you fancy a hark yourself, the show is up online for the next 6 days. My bit starts at 36:30, after "The Going Gets Tough" by the great Billy Ocean. Listen out for an exciting trailer for The Voice UK.

Charlie interviews Royston

CW: So, Royston Blake, we have a new book out called Made of Stone. Tell us a bit about it.

RB: What this "we" bollocks? You might have your name on the front but it's my fucking story. From now on I wants Royston Blake on the front. My next book is gonna be called "Bastard", and it'll be by Royston Blake. It's about you, by the way.

CW: OK, but tell us a bit about the new one, Made of Stone?

RB: Why don't you tell it?

CW: Well, I've told it already in a couple of places, so maybe it's time for a fresh angle on it. And besides, apparently it's *your* story, right?

RB: What's this "fresh angle" bollocks? I had a mate who cut his thumb off with an angle grinder once. He put it in his lunchbox and took it down the ozzy for em to sew back on. They was able to do it and it recovered no problem, but they done it the wrong way round.

CW: They sewed his thumb on the wrong way round?

RB: That's what I fucking said, ennit? There a parrot in here?

CW: I find that hard to believe.

RB: I'll bust your face.

CW: I hear that Made of Stone concerns a few days you spent running around Mangel with Jock, a Scottish man who runs the burger van in Frotfield Way. How did that come about?

RB: I don't like talking about them times. Some beans you can spill only the once and then you gotta forget about em, cos they'm too traumatical. I spilled em to you once, you writ it down and put it in this fucking book or whatever, now shut the fuck up about it.

CW: But we want people to read it, don't we?

RB: I ain't bothered. People can piss off for all I gives a toss.

CW: Well, I don't share that attitude.

RB: You wouldn't, would you? All you wants is the easy life, sitting in front of your typewriter and clacking out stories that cunts like me have came up with. Not only came up with but lived.

CW: Made of Stone is the fifth book in the Mangel series. You must be proud of that.

RB: I'll tell you what I'm proud of. I'm proud of the time that bunch of wankers from East Bloater came down Hoppers and tried running it. Thirty of em there were, lobbing bottles all over and feeling up Rache and that other barmaid we had then, plus doing other bad wossnames, such as putting their fags out on the floor. And putting "Karma Comedian" on the fucking juke box. What I done next, right, which involved busting each one of their swedes, dragging em out and booting em arsewise into the gutter... *that's* what I'm proud of.

CW: It's "Karma Chameleon", by the way.

RB: You what?

CW: I said... OK, it doesn't matter.

RB: Too right it don't fucking matter. You start correcting my words and I'll start correcting your features, you ugly piece of shite. Eh, is that what you been doing in them books? You been tidying up me vocals and changing bits?

CW: I swear I haven't changed a thing. It's straight from the horse's mouth.

RB: Hang on, is you saying I looks like an 'orse?

CW: Is there any truth in the rumours that the Mangel books will be adapted for TV?

RB: Eh?

CW: You know, like a TV series based on Deadfolk and sequels. Or a mini-series?

RB: I had a Mini once. Some twat had left the keys in her in that car park down Strake Hill. Them fucking things is tiny, I swear. Went over a speed bump and nigh on put me swede through the roof. Plus the doors don't open proper. I almost ended up in the fucking canal, only getting out at the last second. You can still see it down there on a clear day.

You can buy MADE OF STONE here (UK), here (US) or here (Can).

The Right Eye of the Tiger

Short Sharp Interview with me over at Paul D Brazill's place. He talks about Rocky, I talk about Rocky... we all talk about Rocky! What else is there to talk about? Oh yes - MADE OF STONE.

Writer waffles about writing

Interview with me over at Iain Rowan's excellent "More News from Nowhere" blog. Check it out if you want to know what I think about writing. Then go check the other interviews with the likes of Ray Banks, Julie Morrigan, Keith Brooke, Paul D Brazill, Gary McMahon and literally shitloads of other top book writing folks. Then go and download Iain's collection, Nowhere to Go, onto your Kindle.

Elsewhere, an article about the Royston Blake books with a Facebook angle on Norway's Stavanger Aftenblad newspaper. If you cannot understand Norwegian, fret not - it just looks really interesting. And the word "fart" is in the title.

Dancing with himself

I interviewed myself for Nigel Bird's blog, Sea Minor. Check it out here. I've done a few of these self-interrogation things and I'm not sure they're healthy. I think I am going slightly insaner with each one. What makes you think that, Charlie? I dunno, just seems like... hey, pack that in!

Left Lion Interview

Interview with me on Left Lion, Nottingham's culture and listings mag. We talk about Graven Image and other stuff. Thanks Robin Lewis.

Blakey interview

Allan Guthrie rather bravely interviews the man himself - Royston Blake. Does he survive? Find out.

Many thanks to Al for the frank questions.

Royston Blake's Top 10 Reads

Ever wondered what a guy like Royston Blake might read? Perhaps you'd like to find out what literary works shaped him, so that you could read them too and maybe become a bit more like him? Reader, your prayers are answered. Jenny Davidson asked him (via me) to spill the beans for her Light Reading blog, and he duly obliged. (Who knew Michael Knight went to Hazzard County?)

Many thanks (and a few apologies) to Jenny!

BEA Interview

Interview with me conducted by Helen Smith. I reply in my usual slack-jawed way to her incisive questions about BookExpo and the USA in general. Helen is the author of Alison Wonderland and Three Sisters, amongst others.

Twisted Interview

Interview with me conducted by David McWilliam of Twisted Tales. Theme is crime and horror. This is in advance of a great event in Liverpool on May 19th. And I don't mean Everton v Chelsea - that's the Sunday following.

Next instalment of Blakey on Tour up later today...

Stuff City

Doesn't the world feel like a better place now? Royston Blake is free, and will be making an appearance in book form next August. It's a bit like when Nelson Mandela was released. Or when the Berlin Wall came down (except we did it without the help of David Hasselhoff). So, a reminder for anyone who didn't hear me shouting about it a few days ago - Mangel book #4 WILL be published, as will the first three (again).

Elsewhere, a nice review of Fags and Lager by Brian Lindenmuth at Spinetingler. BTW, Fags and Lager will be retitled BOOZE AND BURN when it comes out again next June. I'm sure you can guess that this is to do with "fags", which is obviously UK slang for cigarettes but in the USA means "banana", which is just a crazy mix-up and leads to the original title been auto-censored by an army of heavily-armed internet bots. "Burn" is obscure UK prison slang for ciggies, in case you haven't been a guest at one of Her Majesty's obscure establishments.

Also check out this interview with myself, ably conducted by Len Wanner at www.thecrimeofitall.com. Top questions.

Mangel in the paper

Here is an interview with me re the Mangel books in last Sunday's Birmingham Sunday Mercury. Nice that Blakey is not forgotten, though he is taking an extended break in a holiday camp called oblivion at the moment. When he comes back, rested and raring to knock heads, only the faithful (and those willing to be converted) will remain unmolested! Not that Blake's a molester of anything.

Beat Magazine Interview

To coincide with Thursday's Firestation Book Swap, Beat Magazine have done this cool interview with me. As usual, the questions are surprising and incisive and I get confused and disorientated, but I get out of it somehow. Check it out - I think it's a good one.

And come to the Firestation Book Swap (in Windsor, 19.45-21.30). I'm going to bring a great book to swap and YOU might be the one to get it.

Short and Sharp

Paul Brazill throws a few choice questions in my direction over at his blog. Sensing that I am under attack, I return fire with some random answers, taking out a few by-standers. So it goes.

Five For ?

Back in '09 I did a "five for" interview with Susan Tomaselli for 3am magazine. Well, now it's my turn to put five questions to an interviewee. Some of you may know him, some not, but you should all check this out. His name is Royston Blake and he is the former head doorman of Hoppers Wine Bar & Bistro.

Blakey gets a Brazillian

The very brave Paul Brazill has interviewed Royston Blake. Provocative questions and incisive answers, I think you will agree. check it out and join the campaign.

I am a mole and I live in a hole

Five Stairway to Hell-themed questions answered by me at 3am Magazine. They'll make you cry. They'll make you laugh. They'll make you blow your overdraft. On Stairway to Hell... which you can get in a nice double deal along with my first book Deadfolk for a nice £9.52 over at Amazon.co.uk. Hey, it's nearly Christmas.

(Shit, Charlie, didn't anyone tell you it's uncool to promote your wares on your own website?)

No, they didn't. And if anyone knows of someone else's website I can hawk my shit on, drop us a line. For we are living in a material world, and I am a material girl.

Thank you Susan Tomaselli for the five probing questions.

Worcester News

Bit late this, but if you're in Worcester, check out today's Worcester News - on page nine is a feature/interview with me by Mike Pryce, who actually interviewed Jimi Hendrix in 1969 when he played at the Gaumont. Accompanying the interview is a gurning photo of me, holding up a copy of Stairway to Hell, standing outside the bingo hall that used to be the Gaumont. I'll post it up here some time.

Fragen Dazs

A little noir-themed Q&A with me over at the German site www.mordlust.de. It is in English, so chill out and go take a look. Also have a rummage around the rest of this great site - interviews with Jason Starr, Al Guthrie, Vicki Hendricks and many others.

A big danke to Myron Buennagel.

Yo ho ho and a bottle of Buckfast

New Q&A with me - administered by the capable Declan Burke - up on Crime Always Pays*. In it we talk about rubber hoses, Hello magazine and urine. Consider it an early Christmas present.

* And crime does not always pay, kids. Staying in school and laying off the alcopops and glue pays, OK? And internet poker.