Friday, January 26, 2007

Charlie says fuck off

"Felix says keep hunting". That's how the slogan went, on the stickers that someone had slapped on the 30mph sign as you enter my village. Also on the stickers was a cartoon image of an upright fox with a big bushy tail, sticking two fingers up.

So Felix the fox wants to keep hunting, does he? Felix likes being chased all over the countryside by a bunch of inbred dogs and a bunch of even more inbred rich people? Felix likes having the limbs ripped off his body, and his blood daubed across the rosy cheeks of the braying sons and daughters of the ruling class while they talk of providing a "service" to farmers?

Yeah, OK. I'll accept that your theory that Felix is a suicidal masochist and jolly about it. I'll let you keep that theory, becuse it's yours and you hold it so dear. But what I won't let you do is plaster it all over my fucking neighbourhood, in the arrogant and unquestioning believe that the weight of public opinion is on your side. You know what? I wouldn't even care if public opinion were on your side. I'd still rip down your stickers, like I did just now. And if you put them up again, I'll rip them down again.

And if by chance we should meet, while you're putting up or I'm ripping down, we'll have a chat about it.


Hard Man said...

Charlie, it may help to know that in a parallel universe packs of foxes regularly go on aristocrat hunts. It may happen in this universe soon, too. Recent tests have established incontrovertibly that a 5-year-old fox has a higher IQ than an adult aristocrat.

Charlie Williams said...

Is that the same parallel universe where Scotland sometimes wins the World Cup, and the title is an annual struggle between Hearts and Hibs?