Some Very Hard Questions

Ray Banks - the acclaimed Tyne-exiled Scottish noirist - has called me out, or something. I've got to say, I hate the word "meme". (Unless it's got a funny hat in the middle, making it the French word for "same".) But twenty questions (or four) I can do.

Anyway, I think the idea is that I have to spout some answers, and pass them on to some others on the web, thereby perpetuating one of these meme things. Anyway, lets roll...

(1) Imagine it's 2015. You are visiting the library at a major research university. You go over to a computer terminal (or whatever it is they use in 2015) that gives you immediate access to any book or journal article on any topic you want. What do you look up? In other words, what do you hope somebody will have written in the meantime?

Ah, come on. How can I answer that? Too hard.

(2) What is the strangest thing you've ever heard or seen at a conference? No names, please. Refer to "Professor X" or "Ms. Y" if you must. Double credit if you were directly affected. Triple if you then said or did something equally weird.

Never been to a conference. Next question.

(3) Name a writer, scholar, or otherwise worthy person you admire so much that meeting him or her would probably reduce you to awestruck silence.

This is a tough one, but one I will try to answer (seeing as we're halfway through and I haven't answered any yet). I'd like to think I wouldn't be awed into silence by anyone. But who knows? The problem is, some of best writers seem to be such nice people, when you read interviews with them and the like. So you wouldn't be shitting your pants at the thought of meeting them. But to stand next to someone and think... my god, this is the mind that created... Hmm, I think some horror authors would probably stun me into silence. Trouble is, most are dead. Steve Rasnic Tem - he's alive. There you go, a nice obscure one for you. (Er, is he alive?) Go and look him up anyway. If you can, find the short story called "City Fishing". There is a mind that knows darkness.

Thought of another - Nick Cave. He qualifies as a writer through AND THE ASS SAW THE ANGEL. But it's probably his other output that would have me silenced.

(4) What are two or three blogs or other Web sites you often read that don't seem to be on many people's radar?

(Another hard one. Why are all these questions so hard?) I dunno, how about Jenny Davidson's? Sure, it's linked well enough, but do people realise what a great blogger she is? Also there's one by the horror author Tim Lebbon. I used to be in on the horror fiction scene, and he is one of the big up-and-comers. Americans might know him, but sadly horror novels just don't sell over here in the UK. Anyway, I check his journal now and then to see what he's up to.

That was a hard, hard set of questions. Now I'm knackered. Thanks a lot Ray.

Right then, this is the bit where I have to call out other people. Not so easy, as I hardly know any blogger-type people (save ones who will already have done these questions). How about Jai Clare, Jenny Davidson, and um... Neil Gaiman (looking at his blog, seems he's on a world tour - but I can still call him out, right?). (Oh, he's never heard of me and would never have seen this blog... but I can still call him out, right?)