Hay Joe, where you goin' with that crate of champagne in yo hand?

Well, Hay came and went (for me, anyway). We arrived. We met the crew. We drank. We chilled in the green room, hanging out with William Hague and Elvis. (Hague was on 14 pints of lager.) I did my bit on the stage, bringing Royston Blake and Mangel to life for the good folks in the audience, whether they liked it or not. (They probably came for James Hawes, but I refuse to sit quietly.) My wife took a photograph (right). I scrawled my name on some books. We went off into the seedy, dangerous world of Hay-on-Wye after dark. We did some more drinking. We got completely lost in the countryside surrounding Hay, sobering up fast. We got back to the digs at 4am, getting about three hours sleep. We got up. We went back into Hay and I collected my crate of champagne. We went home. There you have it - my big day at Hay.